Last sunny Sunday I drop by a pub in Clapham Common for a drink with Rosa (who interestingly is my X's brother's ex, which makes our friendship even more special).
The place has a great decked garden and is packed with media type, young and good looking, including Richard and Judy's male offspring, who sits at our table and like everyone else here, wears trendy 80' sunglasses and is downing shots.
As it is getting loud and busy, Rosa and I choose to stand up. And as our conversation moves towards girly subjects – mainly complaining about a dry skin around the lips, which commonly occurs in the summer and is, in Rosa's opinion, a sign of dehydration - two handsome guys pass us slowly with visible amusement on their faces. I'm smiling too realising they've heard our dilemma.
They then linger near us and greet the host of the gathering, Rosa's friend Kate. One of them, blond with a messy but very sexy hair, wearing sunglasses (of course!) and some rock&roll t-shirt, faces me (while Kate introduces Rosa to his friend) and asks with husky voice and a grin:
“How is your skin? Still dry?”
“Oh, it's not me – it's my friend” I answer and just can't believe I lie about something that could easily be verified – I actually have some flaky skin around my lower lip.
And wanting to swiftly change the subject I inquire:
“Can you play a guitar?”
“No” he answers.
“Have you got a dog?” I am on the roll now…
“No” he comes again. “That's rather interesting series of questions” he adds.
But I lose interest and take Rosa's offer to get drinks from the bar. He only manages to whisper, “Nice to meet you” to my back.
Shortly after that I leave the party behind, trying not to be late to the dinner that Won't die Wondering is preparing, but I can’t stop thinking about what happened earlier.
I suddenly realise that I might have become desensitized. Yes, not much impresses me any more when it comes to being chatted up. I feel I've seen it all since being on the 'dating scene' for almost a year.
Or was this guy just not good enough?
10 comments:
Aha, good to see WDW is still on the scene!
Simply not up to standard, Bbg.
Your reactors aren't up to speed are they?
just out of interst, if he had've played the guitar, and owned a dog, would you have stayed chatting?
Not that I'm on the dating scene anymore, but I may pinch those lines if I do get chatted up - seems an easy way to brush someone off!
http://www.callherchanelgirl.blogspot.com/
Hello Wombat, good to hear from you again. I'm not sure what you mean by 'your reactors are not up to spead' :-) I was the one who fired the questions and he answered with 'no' without giving an alternative.
Thanks Ian - yeap WDW is in the scene but it's dissapointing that his version of events hasn't been published yet... Don't you think?
Hi Chanel Girl :-) good question. If it happened that he did play guitar and had a dog I would be impressed and therefore challenge him more by asking if he has a collection of bonsai. Only great guys are worth being put through challenge. I've read on your blog that that's what you do too! I love that story how you've made your b/f work so hard to win you back :-)
When the cats away the mice will play...
Sounds like you had a good match?
He is just not good enough! you would know- no matter how corny the pick up line is.... ;-)
Save specific questions for relevant situations. You would not be turned on if I asked you "Do you have a pet iguana?" And it's important that you're at least attracted to each other before going into deeper topics - why? Because otherwise you walk away and assume he was just a jerk. He's probably thinking, "wow those were socially awkward questions. She wasn't worth it anyway."
If you do need a man who plays guitar and has dogs, you can ask that later. However, consider those standards; Brad Pitt doesn't play guitar, but he's passionate about acting and goes out of his way to creatively engage his roles. Isn't that what you're seeking? Passion and creativity? The dog thing.. I have no idea. But seek the deeper level of what your desires are. Being shallow isn't just about liking brunettes, it's about specifically basing your choice in companions on "surface traits" like wealth or choice of instrument. I wouldn't mind dating a wealthy woman, but I would be seeking the passion and skill it required her to create wealth rather than the money itself. Capiche?
Hey Faukes, surely I understand (your argument wasn't that difficult to follow) but as I mentioned earlier I like to challenge men I meet - if a man can't think of a witty reply to an inquiry whether he can play a guitar then I lose hope. And just how this could become a 'socially akward' question? I would hate to be approached with 'socially comfortable' questions as ''are you Greek?' it doesn't even make me want to reply. That's why dating, and finding love is hard becase we are all individual. It may sound banal but it is down to a distribution curve after all. I know where I fit in there. You clearly do too. So good luck.
You're quite right, BBG. I've left a reminder on his blog.
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