Haribo and masturbation



Photo: Akif Hakan Celebi

 
London was a chaos last week. Anarchy on the streets. Theft, fire, and violence.

It brings to mind the old question: “ How would you spend your last minutes knowing the world is ending?” People often answer ‘having sex’. Really, I ask? How easy would it be to find someone to have sex with, right there, on the spot.

For me, this idea evokes even stronger desire to get together with my comedian lover, Adam-the-Boss. So I try to sense if he’s still busy with work, or if we could soon merge in wild love-making:

Beautiful but Grumpy: It’s so hard to work from home. How do you do it??

The Boss: Haribo and masturbation x

BbG: Perfect title for a song. I’m on Nutella. Not so easy to masturbate with a broken leg tho. X

The Boss: Broken leg? God, how did you do that? My turn to business travel now – off to LA! X

BbG: How long for, you lucky thing? I’ve never been (take me with you!) Nothing serious – broken fibula (looking sexy on crutches). Hit by a rolling stone on the way to Mt Blanc but made it to the top! X

The Boss: ouch. Sounds painful. Rest up and heal. X

BbG: Thanks. Have fun in LA (don’t forget your sunblock) x

I stare at my broken leg resting comfortably on the bed frame.

Do I really look sexy on crutches? Why did I need to tell him about the leg?  He is so busy, and the trip to LA must be for a film pitch. Last thing he needs is to be troubled by the outcomes of my risky sports adventures. I add another pillow to support my sore ankle.

God, what if he actually becomes famous? He probably would have even less time for me… It would be great to see him succeed though. He’s so talented and hard working. I lay in bed, with my miserable broken leg, imagining all the fun that fame could bring.